Understanding Codependency

Codependency is often described as losing yourself in someone else. It's a pattern of prioritizing others' needs, emotions, or approval at the expense of your own well-being. Many people with codependent traits learned early on that their worth was tied to how helpful, compliant, or needed they were.

Often rooted in childhood dynamics, codependency can develop in homes where emotions weren’t acknowledged, boundaries weren’t respected, or children had to emotionally care for their caregivers. As a result, many adults struggle to identify their own needs, set boundaries, or feel secure in relationships.

Signs of codependency may include:

• Difficulty setting or holding boundaries

• Feeling responsible for others' emotions

• People-pleasing or avoiding conflict at all costs

• Low self-worth or a shaky sense of identity

• Over-functioning in relationships

• Fear of being rejected or abandoned

You may feel guilty for saying no, overextend yourself to avoid disapproval, or stay in unhealthy relationships to feel needed or validated.

Healing codependency starts with learning to reconnect with your own needs, values, and voice. It involves building self-trust, setting boundaries without guilt, and realizing that you are enough even when you’re not "fixing" or "helping" anyone else. In therapy, we can work on shifting these patterns and learning how to honor your needs without shame